She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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