Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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