Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
