Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize
