No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
