is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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