Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize