'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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