I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
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