How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
