I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
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Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
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Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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