I got chris browned last night
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize