i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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