It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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