This girl is more easily done than said...
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
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I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
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Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.