Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
25 True Facts That Sound Fake AF
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
27 Hairstyles That Always Come With A Matching Personality
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.