just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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