what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
