I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize