TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
