Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize