yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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