what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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