he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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