Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
