How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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