well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
