My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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