maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Randomize