i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
