At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Someone came in the potted fern
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
