i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
