I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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