Heybabeimwearingurpanties
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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