so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
It's Friday. Sex?
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize
