Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
