Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
