But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Success! We fucked roommates!
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
