normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize