No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.