I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.