When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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