I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Randomize
