True but thats because hes a fetus.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
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