it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
