and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
