Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
