East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
