hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
