It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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