have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
No I am not eating basil off your cock
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize
