Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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