We're facebook friends in real life
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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