she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
