I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
